Springfield Business Journal_2020-12-25

12 · SBJ.NET DEC. 28, 2020-JAN. 3, 2021 | Dr. Shelly Farnan 1 Meet your brain. This is your life on brain science. Be mindful of and get curious about the brains of others, and always invest in and dispense hope. Brain science applies to every space – well beyond psychology and kindness, – into the spaces we frequent and enjoy daily: home, family, work, business, sports, faith, culture, racism and politics. Think of any space and know brain science is at play. Why? Our brains are survival brains, and they survive best when in healthy connection with others. Our brains develop based on what we have learned and, subsequently, are limited by what we haven’t learned. Now, when our brains experience hope and sense possibility, it produces the chemical dopamine. Dopamine motivates us to continue forward. 2 Check your pack. Assumptions, bias and blind spots – we all have them. Some are key to our survival and others have outlived their expiration date and negatively impact us and others. Breaking news: This doesn’t mean you are bad or good! It means you are human. Let’s check our own packs, and create communities and spaces in which we all feel safe to check our packs and supportive enough to help check each other’s. Then, from our pack checks, lean in to the spaces we have yet to learn and know. 5 Grow your social capital. Make new friends and keep the old – then introduce and connect them to each other. Outcomes in therapy are based on the relationship with the therapist. Outcomes in the world are based on our relationships with each other. The change of the future is rooted in relationship. When my brain sees a “you” and I’ve never seen a “you” before, my survival state kicks in and registers, “danger.” When I experience a “you” over time and my brain learns that you are no longer a threat, my survival state stops firing and I can now experience you as you are, a fellow human. 3 Get uncomfortable. It’s vital we know our history, our present and our privilege. Here’s how: Our history books do not share an all-inclusive history. Fortunately, you and I can get caught up. Any chance you get, hear from and experience the likes of Lyle Foster and Leslie Anderson of the Facing Racism Institute, Wes Pratt of Missouri State University, Francine Pratt of Prosper Springfield, Tough Talks and the Missouri College Access Network, and Joe Yancey, retired leader of Places for People in St. Louis. Be curious about the following: nonpersonhood, systemic and institutional racism, 13,000 lynchings that occurred after slavery ended, land grants, access to legal documents and legal support, the Jim Crow laws, redlining, the Tulsa race massacre, “The New Jim Crow,” code switching, microaggressions, generational trauma, Tony McDade, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, George Floyd and the difference between a protest and a riot. 4 Go platinum. Use the platinum rule in place of the golden rule. The golden rule – “Treat others the way you wish to be treated” – is really more about you than it is anyone else. Upgrade to the platinum rule: “Treat others the way they wish to be treated.” Welcome people to be their authentic selves, learn about who they are, then treat them the way they want and need to be treated. Affirm the identities of others. Pronouns matter. Pronouns save lives. 6 Be a validator and a disruptor. To validate: Find the truth in the other person’s perspective. It doesn’t mean we agree with it or love it, just that we see the nugget of truth. There are six levels of validation; check them out and watch the short video, “It’s Not About the Nail.” To disrupt: Intentionally engage so as to interrupt the regular way of operating. Disruptors must first commit to learning beyond their worldview and experiences, then purposefully think and act differently. Speak up when you notice those who are not at the table, not making decisions or are not included. Speak up when those microaggressions register and discrimination occurs. Welcome and elevate the voices of those marginalized. creekside.elfindaleretirement.com 1601 South Fort, Springfield, MO 65807 | (417) 831-3828 Active, Independent Living! “Staff knows & calls each resident by his or her first name.” —Verified Review Gracious Living • Exciting Choices • Affordable Pricing Building With Pride! Call Rich Today!